Forgive and Forget
by Memento Arcane
Summary: Alex Conner is a Celtic witch who's been reborn four times in the last one hundred and fifty seven years. Damon Salvatore is the reason she's stuck this way. Four generations later Alex returns to Mystic Falls where the Salvatore's once more live. Anyone else see trouble brewing? **Might change to M later**
1. Coming Home

_**Disclaimer!**__ I do not own the gorgeous cast of Vampire Diaries, or the series! Sadly…But Alex is mine, so please don't 'borrow' her or the storyline to Forgive and Forget. Anywho, on with the story!_

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**Part One: Love the Way You Lie**

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

"Sit up straight Alexandria." The words rang clear and cutting through the humid spring air. A sigh was pulled from my lips. The corset was pulling tight on my ribcage and breathing was once more difficult.

"Yes Grandmother." I murmured meekly, eyes downcast as the carriage rattled down the well-traveled road to the Salvatore Household. It was shaded here within the cabin, but outside the noon day sun pounded the forest with its harsh light. Once more I wished that the garden party could have taken place in the evening. But no, high noon it was to be. It was to be my reintroduction to the Mystic Falls society. To be gone the duration of four years in the countryside of Virginia may as well have been a time of banishment.

The carriage came to a stop, ending my moments in the blessed shade. The door opened, a prim footman bowing with a hand extended. Grandmother exited first, her burgundy skirts rustling as she alighted on the ground. It was a graceful descent worthy of any matriarch. Mine was decidedly less so. The violet skirts were only a hindrance as I slipped to the dusty road, nearly stumbling to my face as the hem caught. Grandmother only watched with contempt and disappointment. I was too busy staring at the mansion to care.

It was beautiful, the Georgian expanse that sprawled in a decadent array of brick and marble. Lush lawns, well-manicured and lined with flowers graced the drive and oaks draped thin shadows across estate. What I would give to hide beneath their eaves. "Come Alexandria." Grandmother snapped. I followed behind her as she glided to the entryway. The doors swung open, the wigged doorman bowing politely. A man detached himself from the parlor doors and smiled graciously.

"Madame O'Conner." He took my Grandmother's gloved hand in his, kissing it lightly.

"Master Salvatore." Grandmother attempted a smile. It failed abysmally.

The man raised his head and caught my gaze. "And this must be the young Miss Alexandria returned from Antietam." His eyes sparkled with some kindness, brown and warm.

I curtsied and gave a small smile as any lady should. "A pleasure."

He nodded in kind and gestured towards another door. "Please, enjoy the party outside." Another smile and then he turned to the next set of guests. Grandmother gripped her parasol close and continued on. She immediately found her sewing group of ladies and waved me to the social circles surrounding the white lawn tables set around a small pond. I chose to escape down a path of woodchips. No doubt a scolding would follow later.

A small clearing was the reward of my curiosity. Two stone benches lay in the shadow of an ash tree. It was there I took my reprieve. The sun had raised the humidity to levels that most aquatic creatures could survive in; no doubt my mass of scarlet waves was already curling out of their wrapped bun, the horror! A laugh bubbled from my lips at the thought.

"What are you laughing at?" A voice asked. I jumped to my feet, skirts rustling and hand flying to my throat. "I did not mean to frighten you." It was a young man, dark waves of black hair and cool blue eyes standing out in the bright light. I had not seen him in four years. "Alexandria?" he gaped.

The small smile returned, genuine this time. "Hullo Damon."

_Present...  
_

I blinked, staring down at the ink blot that marred the diary's page. The family shrink told me that writing down my emotions and memories would help the nightmares go away. It hadn't worked yet, but the writing had become a habit over the last few years. Outside the moon glowed, casting shadows over the library. I should be asleep, jet lag and all that. Apparently after the multitude of plane rides my body no longer reacted to the time change. So at three in the morning I could only write and listen to the nighttime sounds of Mystic Falls. Da would have told me to unpack. I refused to. It was stupid, but I hoped eventually we would just leave this town again. I wasn't here because I wanted to be.

The grandfather clock chimed the half hour, another reminder that it was time for me to crash. If only I could. I sighed, turning once more the diary. The pen scratched against the thick paper, mingling with the ticking of the clock. Soon I slipped into a haze of writing and turning off my thoughts.

"Alex." The pen had stopped scratching five hours ago. Somehow it had rolled under my chin… "Alex." A familiar voice tickled at my conscious. "Alexandria!" the voice snapped.

My eyes shot open, "Yes Grandmother!" I gasped.

"Grandmother?" My father blinked, laughing slightly. "Gran is off at the keep girl. What're you dreaming of?" he chortled.

I yawned, shaking my head. "Mornin' da." Somehow I had managed to sleep. It was a miracle.

"You ready for the day?" he asked, grinning ever wider.

No. I was not. Today we visited the Lockwood household and I got to meet the Founders. I could only guess that the old families still had their stupid council running too. Not something I was looking forward to. At least I'd be heading to Duke for college in the fall. Then Mystic Falls would be far away for most of the year. But that was three months away. Three months spent in this historic town where the memories would cause my Gran to begin muttering some proverbial spell or something. But I smiled anyways, because Da was already feeling bad enough for his actions. "Yeah. Ought to be fun." Yeah, it should be about as fun as the time Seamus threw me into the loch during October.

At this he nodded, bouncing on the balls of his feet. He was excited. It was about time the O'Conner had returned to their American household. That was his idea anyways. "A chance to redeem the American market on herbal remedies!" was how my Da had explained it. Like anyone in America beside the remainder of the Woodstock generation would want herbal foot scrub. But it paid the bills on my car collection so I couldn't complain, yet anyways. I said nothing more and my Da began to look uncomfortable. "I'll go get dressed." I muttered, shutting the diary and leaving the library.

The bedroom I had chosen was in the West Wing of the house, far away from the original wing where the Civil War era household had lived. I had my reasons. Still, it was pretty enough. The bed was a four poster, dresser and desk traditional oak. I had put up my ACDC and Chris Young posters already but otherwise it remained the room of a young woman's. I needed to work on that.

Humming a Flogging Molly tune under my breath I rummaged through my suitcase, still thrown on the floor where I had left it last night. I pulled the dark jeans, tunic, and flats from the balled up mix of clothes and dressed, mildly annoyed that Slipknot was not an accepted shirt choice at this tea thing.

Da was brewing coffee in the kitchen as I stomped down the staircase. My eyes felt heavy and lined with dirt. It wasn't just the mascara either. Yawning again, I poured a mug of the caffeinated beverage and began to sip at the murky black substance. It wasn't too tasty. "No cream?" Da asked, green eyes wrinkled with concern.

"Working on the jet lag." I supplied, grabbing an apple from the grocery bag on the table and biting into the deep red skin. He made a gesture of understanding and ran a hand through his fading brown hair. I could tell you one thing, I did not get my looks from Da. Gran pinned the red hair and hazel eyes down to genetic skips. I blamed karma and magic.

"We ready to go?" Da asked, car keys in hand. I nodded, munching on the apple. He grinned and headed to the drive way. "Do you want to take the bike?"

Yes. Of course I did! Smiling the first real grin the whole day, I chugged the remains of the coffee and grabbed my own keys. "See ya over there." I tossed over my shoulder and ran to the garage. My beautiful Ninja waited. Silver and black, the sports bike could outrun any Harley out there. It was my birthday gift from Gran. I was not supposed to crash it, under any circumstances.

The engine started with a deep purr, eliciting a grin of appreciation. This would be the best part of my entire day. I slid the helmet over my pony tail and gunned the engine. With a spurt of speed I was out of the garage and following Da's Camry out of the drive. Behind us the gates to the house swung shut with a sharp clanging. With a growing sense of unease, I followed the car North to town. For some reason…I just knew this was not going to end well.

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**And there's the first chapter! Meet Alex- the Celtic Witch with an attitude- and Alexandria, the young American Southern Belle! Any comments, critiques (ehm, constructive, please.), or suggestions are more than welcome!**

**_Theme Song:_  
**

_"Love the Way You Lie"- Skylar Grey__  
_


	2. Cup of Chaos

_**Disclaimer!** I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of the extremely attractive cast...alas...However, Alex and her story are mine. Please don't 'borrow' her! And now, onto a tea party!_

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_Mystic Falls, 1862_

Mayor Lockwood held another of his balls last evening. The mansion had changed little in my four years absence. No, in fact, it had remained the same Victorian beauty that had housed the Christmas Ball of my twelfth year. But its inhabitants had changed. Mayor Lockwood had changed. I had crossed him berating George in the study as the party commenced downstairs. It was frightening, his eyes flashed gold for a moment and a monster had replaced his face. George had only shrugged it off. Grandmother had told me to ignore it but something told me it should be remembered.

_Present  
_

The Lockwood land had grown since the last time I was here, by more than a hundred acres. It was still pretty, but I couldn't say much more. I hated nearly everything about this town, the Lockwood Mansion included. Da, on the other hand, loved it. "Look at this!" he whistled, walking up the wide front steps. "Piece o' beauty ain't it?"

"It's nice." I shrugged. Been there, seen that. He knocked on the front door and waited, I tapped my flats on the tiled porch. The door opened and a middle aged woman with mid length brown hair and an expensive suit on smiled at us.

"You must be the Conners." She smiled widely, extending her hand. "I'm Carol Lockwood." A spark of understanding this was the head of the Lockwood family now. I inhaled deeply, remaining with my arms crossed and sour look ruining her niceties. She didn't smell like a dog.

"Michael Conner." Da extended his own hand and firmly shook Carol's hand in his own. I frowned at the American version of the family name. Gran would have thrown a fit. I said nothing and remained in the moody teenage persona that was working quite well for me. He glanced at me, waiting for my intro I suppose.

"I'm Alex." I muttered.

Da shook his head, but technically I didn't do anything wrong. Carol cast me a disappointed look. No doubt Da had regaled her with tales about my good manners over the phone. Those only applied when I was in a good mood. "Well, the Founders are waiting. Do come in." Her thousand watt smile was annoying, but Da replied with one in kind and stepped into the house. I followed grudgingly.

Inside air conditioning thrummed through the vents, cooling the rooms that appeared as if the Civil War had happened yesterday, minus the TVs and radios of course. Carol walked on ahead, leading us to the living room. A group of people sat sipping iced tea and speaking quietly. "Everyone." Carol cleared her throat. The room's occupants turned to stare at us while I fidgeted uncomfortably. "This is Michael and Alex Conner."

Suddenly there was a swarm of townsfolk. I nearly died from the flashbacks. Only this time they didn't have torches and a Winchester aimed at my head. Through the melee of intros, I caught two. The first was from a teen my age, and man did he smell like wet dog. "Tyler Lockwood." He smiled cockily.

The second was a man whose eyes bored into mine. I knew those eyes. They had once held mine in another era. "Jonathan Gilbert, a pleasure to meet you Alex." Ah, that explained it. A Gilbert. His keen gaze told me he knew just a little too much for his own good. John smiled, and I could only think of a snake as his eyes twinkled. "Where's Damon?" he asked Carol.

"Kitchen." She replied. "Care for some tea Alex?" John asked, gesturing towards what I knew to be the kitchen. I nodded absently, following him as Da set about speaking with the town's royalty. Jonathan Gilbert was a quiet man, and said nothing as he passed through the halls. I stayed the same, noticing the newer pieces that had come to the house since last I was here.

"Here we are." John stepped inside a room that differed from the rest. Chrome and steel decorated the chef styled kitchen, windows wide open to light the Hell's Kitchen fan dream room. The fridge was open, a man with dark hair and clothing peering inside. "Pass me the tea Damon." Jonathan asked, pulling forth two cups from a cabinet. I went to the window, staring at the grounds that had grown since 1864. A fountain played nearby, its sweet water scenting the air.

"Here you go." A glass of amber tea appeared before my line of sight. I took it, smiling slightly.

"Tha-"The glass fell from my grasp, shattering against the pristine tiled floor. Tea soaked through my flats, and my hands began to shake.

"Are you okay?" I nearly sobbed as the soft voice and concerned eyes of Damon Salvatore caught mine.

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**Well, there it is! Finally got over my writer's block thanks to a new playlist of music themed on these two! (If you want to know what it is, I've got a list somewhere *glances at huge mess of papers on the desk*...somewhere...**

**Anywho, rate! I would love to hear some ideas and constructive criticism.  
**

**_Theme__ Song:_**

_"Jar of Hearts"- Christina Perri  
_


	3. Ours

_**Disclaimer!**__ I do not own the gorgeous cast of Vampire Diaries, or the series! Sadly…But Alex is mine, so please don't 'borrow' her or the storyline to Forgive and Forget. Anywho, on with the story!_

* * *

_Present_

"I-I'm fine." Flushing brightly, I knelt to pick up the glass. "Stare at his jeans Alex, stare at his shoes…anything!" I was thinking to myself, heart pounding. It needed to slow. He couldn't know anything was wrong. But something was wrong! He was supposed dead, nothing more than dust in the ground by now. I knew. I was there when they were shot!

A slightly tanned hand reached down to pick up the glass shards I missed. Damon was smiling, holding out his hand for me to take. I ignored it and rose to my feet, taking the glass and wrapping it in a paper towel before tossing it. I needed out of the house. Now. Taking a step to the door, I found my way blocked. "You must be Alexandria O'Conner." Damon's hand was outstretched again. "I'm Damon Salvatore."

"Uh-yeah. I'm Alex." I took his hand, hating myself every minute of it. Ice spread from his fingertips. Blinking in stark surprise, I quickly stepped around him and raced to the living room. Only one type of being on this Earth felt like that. "Dad, I need to er...unpack. See you at home. Nice to meet you all." The Council appeared shocked as I raced out of their like a bat from hell. The bike started with a growl and then I was gone.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

"Good day to Miss Alexandria."

I turned to smile at the young man holding a bouquet of flowers in his gloved hands. "And to you, Master Salvatore." Damon smiled kindly at me, his glass like eyes twinkling with the contained mirth of one who knew something I did not. It was very likely. Damon did so love his games. Behind him the carriage awaited, though I highly doubted it would be in use for very long. Sneaking out past Grandmother required the use of less practical means.

"Right this way." Sweeping his arm up in a gracious bow, the young Salvatore gestured for me to enter the cabin. Smiling, I did so. The cool interior lessened the unbearable heat of the summer that had burned its way into the petticoats and corset. I sat, managing to fit the layers of clothing into the carriage. Damon leapt in beside me, shutting the door and sealing us away from the world. The creak of the wheels sounded and the horses took off.

For a moment we were silent, watching the tree line of the manor disappear. Damon spoke first. "So, any guesses on where we are going Miss Conner?"

I raised a brow, small smile playing on my lips. "Why no Master Salvatore, I do not."

Damon chuckled, keen blue eyes flashing. "Good. It's a secret."

"And I do so hate those. You really are a tease sometimes, Damon Salvatore." Tapping him lightly with a finger, I hid a grin beneath the silk of my fan. A moment later the carriage lurched to a stop.

"Here we are." That smile was on his lips again. How I loved to be on the recipient end of that smile.

I stepped out, taking his hand gladly for the balance, and for guilty pleasure. "Oh, Damon!" A gasp is loosed from my lips. It was beautiful, a hidden clearing. Birdsong and the sweet scent on lemon grass mingled, while a brook played its avian to the avian melody.

"You like it?" His eyes were on me now, fingers twining through my own.

Slowly I nodded, meeting his gaze. "It's beautiful."

"Good, because now it's ours." Ours. I loved the sound of that.

_Now_

A scowl had managed to permanently glue to my face. God I hate this place. This meadow had held far too many happy memories with a man who was supposed to be dead. Which clearly Damon Salvatore was not. For the freaking Mother's sake, he even had his gorgeous smile. Why oh why did Da bring me back here? More importantly, why did Gran? That was my reason for coming to this meadow. To contact her. Sadly, she refused to buy a cell phone. And a letter would take far too long. But here there was a direct draw to the elements. Even if she didn't care a cell, Gran always had her mirror in one of the many pockets found in her clothing.

I sat within the pentagram that had been traced moments before. Eyes closed, I inhaled slowly and drew a prick of blood with the small pocket knife that had been in my back pocket. The familiar shocking surge of magic raced to my fingertips. The pentagram glowed white hot, and suddenly it smelled of salt spray and rain.

"Alexandria O'Conner!" The thick brogue of Brighid O'Conner, matriarch of the Irish clan, snapped through the meadow. The birds stopped singing. Yes, even far away on the Emerald Isle, Brighid managed to silence Mother Nature.

"Gran." I intoned, crossing my arms.

"Well what do you want girl? I have errands ta run an' a family ta feed." I couldn't see her. There was not a mirror to use. But from the tone she was using, Gran was annoyed, as always.

"I just came back from an interesting meeting with the Founders. Did you know vampires have come back to Mystic Falls? And one of them just happened to be Damon Salvatore?"

The blunt question was met with silence. Gran was debating with herself. "An' I take it ya want ta know why I let ya return?"

"Well, yes. Obviously."

Another pause. Somewhere near her a tea kettle hissed. "Damon Salvatore cheated death. In doin' so, he took another's life. I think ya know what I speak of. It didn't sit well with the O'Conner's. We took action, but sadly, our matriarch at the time chose revenge to solve the problem instead of sending her daughter ta Ceridwen's field."

What? What was she talking about? More importantly, why did this sound like I was about to be thrown into an age old grudge between witches and vampires. "Gran, who are you talking about?" Dred roiled in my stomach with the coffee I should not have had.

"Ya know what I am speaking of Alex. How can you not? After all, ya remember everything else." The pentagram was fading in color. The spell would not last much longer. Contacting her again would be pointless, this place would be devoid of the energy needed for a night. I pressed on, words hurried.

"Gran, you can't be serious! That was two hundred years ago. I want to forget how I died and live this life like I'm normal for once!" Of course. Of course fate had to set me astray from the path of 'normal'. That was ancient history! I wanted to live in the now, not eighteen sixty two. I did not want to relive those memories.

"Alexandria. Ya know your task. Ye've known it since you saw the vampire again. If ya want to be normal, kill the demon and be done with it. Otherwise, get over it." Silence fell. My jaw dropped, and the pentagram's light died. Gran was gone, and I had just been issued one of the worst ultimatums known to man. Kill Damon Salvatore. Well, irony has stuck and my heart had started up a death sprint beat. Gods be damned, just leave it to a clan of witches to want an eye for an eye.

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**So, that's all for this chapter. Whatcha think?**

**_Theme__ Song:_**

_"Kill the Light" - Lacuna Coil  
_


	4. Fate's a b-

**Disclaimer!**_I do not own Vampire Diaries (much to my great sadness...) or any of the characters written here from the series. Alex is mine, as is her family and story. Please don't 'borrow' her! Anywho, onto the chaos!_ _  
_

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_Present_

_"If ya want to be normal, kill the demon and be done with it."_

How did normal even work into that ultimatum? Sighing, I rose from the charred pentagram that would fade by the morrow and turned towards the trail that would lead me home. I had never thought the reason for my reincarnation was to deliver death to a man I once had loved. Truth be told, I had never wondered at the reason for my continual rebirth in general. I had figured it was some age old curse, something I had done in a past life, but could not fathom why if that were the case, could I only remember back to the sixteen hundreds? Well, that had been answered. Once again Damon Salvatore had managed jack up my life more than I thought possible. You would think after he killed me I could be let alone.

For a moment a deafening silence fell over the clearing. Turning back, I watched as a swallow landed beneath the eaves of a pine and hooted softly. An ache had begun to develop in my stomach, and though magic was still stirring within my veins, I felt indescribably cold. Eyes glinting, I gave the bird a disdainful look before making towards the bike. A long time ago that clearing had always held birdsong and soft laughter. I felt no pain in leaving part of it charred and empty.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

Once again, autumn brought chilled nights and the burning change of the trees. It was my first harvest time for two years, and I had forgotten how much I missed the scent of fresh apple cider and clean cut straw lingering in the air. There was little more revitalizing than a crisp October morning. Much to my grandmother s annoyance, I had discovered a new way out of the house, and to my endless amusement, she had yet to find it. It was my escape route, and as I passed through the small tunnel of the manor, I could not help but smile. I knew there was to be a carriage waiting tonight; my heart racing.

Light broke through the dim blackness of the tunnel, and the cold air of night nipped at my cheeks. My smile did not fade as a hand extended into the tunnel s darkness and pulled me out and into a warm embrace. Suddenly I did not all too much mind the cold. "You're warm." I breathed, burrowing into the warmth Damon always seemed to carry. He chuckled and kissed my cheek.

"And you are shivering already Alexandria. Come, I've got a fire going at the cabin." His glass blue eyes glittered cheerfully as he took my hand. I would have liked nothing more than to stand in his arms longer, but it was reaching the freezing temperatures already. Sighing, I cast him a mischievous smile and followed him into the carriage. "You seem quiet tonight Alex." Damon said softly, brushing his thumb across my knuckles. I shivered and turned away from the window, already we were near the cabin that had been our haven for these last three months.

"Forgive me, I did not mean to be." There had simply been quite a lot going on at the manor. Grandmother had family members from Britain and Ireland returning for visits this last month, and the unrest was nearly unbearable. I could sense some of them watching me in the halls, and at times I wished that Gaelic was one of my languages, for I knew they spoke of me.

Damon merely chuckled and shook his head. "It s fine Alexandria. I simply thought you could grace me with those pretty eyes of yours, and not the window."

I could not help but laugh then. His fingertips touched my cheek, and I could not want more than anything to be at the cabin sooner.

_Present_

I was hoping Da would not have returned from the Founder s yet. It would seem Fate had a penchant for making my life suck, because his Civic was parked in front, and behind it was a shiny 1967 Chevy Camaro. Did he manage to pick up a chick in town? Or had a Founder followed him home? That wouldn't surprise me. They wormed their way into everything one hundred and fifty years ago, what s to stop them now? If I didn't have a really strong sense of bad news, I would have drooled at that gorgeous car. Alas, my mood did not allow for such a waste of time, I had moody teenage things to do like kicking walls and drowning my sorrows in television.

Thankfully, I did manage to shut the front door without slamming it. Points for my temper control I suppose. Sighing, I tossed my keys into the bowl reserved for my random crap and shrugged out of the biker jacket. "Alex?" Da called from the den. I had hoped to make it to my room before he could talk to me about my episode. Running a hand through my hair, I made my way to the den and stopped in the doorway.

"Yeah Da?"

He turned and smiled at me, dimples imprinted into his cheeks. I thought he d be bright red and about ready to rip me a new one, but he seemed completely at ease, sitting in his leather arm chair from home with a cup of coffee in hand. "I've brought home guests for dinner. The tea was certainly a great place to meet people." Ah, there was the chagrin in his voice. I smiled meekly. I knew it must have been a Founder.

"Alright Da. Did you need me to start dinner?" I asked, hoping to make amends.

"There's no need. I've got it covered."Someone said from behind me.

Ice cubes slid down my spine as Da grinned and rose from his seat. "You met Damon Salvatore, right? He and his brother offered to help with dinner tonight."

I m pretty sure at the moment I was about as tan as a glass of milk. Turning around, I found myself face to face with Damon for the second time today. "We met." I said brightly, plastering a fake smile on my face.

"Alex right?" Damon smiled back, and I was wishing he wore glasses as those glass eyes settled on me. This wasn't Fate being tricky. This was Fate being a straight up bitch.

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**So that's all for this chapter! I do so love a good bit of drama ^^ If you've got ideas, a critique, you name it, shoot it to me! Thanks for reading!**

**_Theme Songs:_  
**

_"A Thousand Years" - Christina Perri_**  
**


	5. Hell's Kitchen P1

_**Disclaimer!** I do not own Vampire Diaries or it's amazing cast, as much as I wish it were so! Alex and her story are mine, so please don't 'borrow' her! Thanks, and now onto the next bit of havoc!  
_

* * *

_Present_

"That's me." Glancing back at Da, I slipped past the vampire and gave him a cocky grin. "If you're the one cooking, I think I'll need to supervise." The mock insult in my tone was the best I could do right now. It wouldn't make sense for Alex Conner, girl next door and new to town, to hate him right away. The real Alex O'Conner was having a small panic attack in her quiet corner. Da had gone off and invited a vampire into the house!

Damon smirked and chuckled. He used to do that quite a bit when we were alone… "How do you know I'm not an amazing cook?"

I arched my brows. "You're amazing? Better prove it. We'll be in the kitchen Da!" I called, giving my father a slight wave and heading off towards the kitchen. Damon had been able to cook in eighteen sixty two, and how many years has he had to perfect that art? Almost nervously, I glanced back to see if he was following. Damon grinned at me from a few feet away, strolling along as if he owned the manor. "About earlier…" I said, feigning shy. "I um, didn't mean to freak out. Had a long day and jet lag was starting to get to me. Sorry if I acted crazy." Is it sad I wanted to roll my eyes at myself?

"I figured it was just my gorgeous self." Damon quipped. Inwardly I shuddered. I did not need this. I did not need those gorgeous eyes watching me as I walked through the halls of a place I had never wanted to return to.

"I must be oblivious. I didn't see anything too special when we met."

My tone was harder this time, and Damon seemed to pause a moment. I hadn't meant to slip on that. "I'll just have to work on changing your mind." He said amiably, teasing tone still in place.

"Good luck with that." Luck wouldn't give him a chance in hell. Inwardly I wished that striking him with a bolt of magic right now wasn't a bad idea. Could it be considered community service? After all, I would be ridding the world of a vampire and cocky pain in the-

"Is there a reason you're turning bright red?"

"Huh?" I blinked, the stream of insults running through my mind derailed as Damon nudged my arm. Goosebumps raced up my arm, and a shiver scuttled down my spine. I wanted to hit him for touching me.

A small smirk crossed his features. "You're the color of a tomato now Alex." His tone was amused. "In fact, it's clashing perfectly with your hair." Perfect…humor from a dead guy. And of course, I had no idea how to respond to his question. What would I say, 'yeah just thinking of ways to _kill you!_', because that would work so well. Thankfully, our arrival to the kitchen stemmed any need for such a reply. Sadly, the kitchen was not empty either. Yet another familiar face was tapping his chin and reading a cookbook. Stefan Salvatore. He should have been dead too.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

"Miss Alexandria. How pleasant to see you here again." Stefan Salvatore smiled benignly from his place at the parlor desk, his green eyes glittering with his usual kind greeting. I had thought the manor was to be empty today, that is, empty of all but Damon. It had been quiet upon entering, the scent of wax candles lingering in the air.

A small, polite smile graced my lips. "Hullo Stefan, a pleasure to see you as well." When last I had seen him, long enough to share a few words, Damon had invited grandmother and myself over for dinner with Giuseppe's name signed to the parchment. Grandmother was expecting a proposal for my hand any time. I, despite my fervent attempts to remain away from such matters, could not help but blush at the thought.

Stefan rose from the desk, smoothing down his vest and closing the book that he must have been browsing. "What can I do for you?"

"Actually, I came to see-''

Scarcely had I uttered a sentence and Stefan's smile widened. "My brother is in the garden Alexandria. I'm certain he would be more than happy to see you." Stefan had always been rather resourceful. It did not surprise me that he knew of Damon and I.

"Thank you, Stefan." I murmured, demure and quiet, though my answering smile was enough for his to warm considerably.

"You're most welcome Alexandria." As I turned for the garden, I did not see his eyes follow me. And yet, I could feel a shadow pass over my heart as I stepped out of the warm house and into the snow covered garden.

_Present_

Stefan glanced up from the book and caught sight of myself and Damon. Something unreadable flickered in his eyes, but I didn't need to guess what it was. A small stirring of magic brightened in my veins, and the chill Damon had brought faded ever so slight. Suddenly Stefan sharpened in contrast and the world fell silent.

_*She looks like Alexandria. It's…shocking. Is it genetics, or something else?*_ He had been perceptive back then, and now with his vampire nature that would have been amplified. Stefan's thoughts said as much. With the magic dimming and the world returning to color and sound I just barely caught the end of his greeting. "—be Alex. I'm Stefan." He smiled, the vivid green eyes I remembered so well sparkling, his hand held out.

My smile was getting a work out today. "That's me. It's nice to meet you Stefan." I took his hand and decided that a vacation was in order after this. "So what's for dinner?" I asked politely.

Stefan promptly listed off a menu that under normal circumstances would have made me drool. I do appreciate good cooking, but playing chef with two vampires simply brought 'Hell's Kitchen' to a whole new level.

* * *

**So, there's the first bit of Hell's Kitchen. I'm keeping things shorter chapter wise so it doesn't drag on too long. Rate, shoot me some ideas, and some criticism is always appreciated!**

**_Theme Songs:_  
**

**__**_"All Around Me" - Fly Leaf  
_


	6. Hell's Kitchen P2

**Disclaimer!** _I do not own the Vampire Diaries or any of its characters, as much as I would LOVE to. But Alex and her story are mine. Please don't 'borrow' her! Thanks for reading! ^^_

* * *

By the time Stefan had something in the oven, I was beginning to wish that I could have feigned illness and hidden in my room. Not only was it disconcerting to see him wearing an apron, a sight of which I never needed in this or any other life time, but I was having serious conflicts at the moment. Why? That food smelled amazing. Mouthwatering, stomach rumbling, five star chef amazing. It was ridiculous that when at the moment I should be worried about the two vampires in my kitchen who had known me in a past life, I was more concerned with the chicken broiling in the oven.

I needed to work on my priorities.

Of course, it could only going to get worse.

"Stefan, you still running to grab that wine?" Damon asked from his place at the sink where he was slicing various vegetables. My eyes had landed on the knife in his hands several times in the last minute. He was a vampire, he didn't need a knife. But it still had me on edge. Not surprising, this entire freaking fiasco had me on edge.

"Right. I'll be right back. Alex, can you take the desert?" Stefan turned to me, smiling again. I wish I could wipe the smile off his face. Because of course, that would leave me alone with Damon.

"Of course I can." Another far too cheery grin accented my answer. The younger of the two Salvatores nodded and left the kitchen, leaving me alone with Damon and a bowl of strawberries that needed sliced. Instantly an awkward silence fell, the only sound coming from the antique ceiling fan churning the humid Virginian air with a rhythmic wheezing. Glancing at Damon, I found a paring knife and picked up the bowl of strawberries. "Excuse me." I muttered, attempting to gain access to the sink.

Damon refused to move, surprise surprise. He turned his eyes on me, a smirk on his lips. Cheekily he cocked his head to one side and gave me a long look. "You don't seem to like me." He summarized breezily.

"I don't? Sorry, I left my Team Damon t-shirt in Ireland." I replied, nudging him away from the sink and turning the faucet up as high as possible. The water's hissing bought me a few seconds from conversation as I rinsed the berries. They were bright against the stainless steel of the sink, for a moment they looked like a scarlet stain against the sink. How ominous. I did not need an ominous sign at the moment, thank you Universe.

The second the sink was off, Damon started speaking again. He never used to talk this much. Did immortality make for the inability to shut up? "Why is that? I mean the not liking me part. I can find you another t-shirt easy enough." The last part was accented with yet another cocky smile.

Muttering a few swear choice Celtic swears beneath my breath that I know he would hear but would not understand, I moved the fruit to the island and began to systematically slice them. "I never said I didn't like you." _Slice. _

"Ah, but you don't have to say anything. Most women faint at the sight of me. You have yet to so much as blush." Damon quipped. _Slice. _

"I'm not most women." I retorted, throwing a few cut berries back into the bowl. _Slice. Slice. Slice._ What's this, silence from the god of sarcasm? I must write this down. _Slice._ I had nearly finished my work when he finally did speak again, something soft and dangerous in his words.

"No. That you aren't."

I froze, knife hovering over the final strawberry. Was there a glimmer of understanding in that sentence? Why did it partly seem to be a threat? I glanced up and saw him watching me, glass eyes dark and hooded. Better question, why wouldn't it be a threat? The cold feeling returned. Hastily I glanced away and cleared my throat. _Slice. _I won't lie. My hands were shaking as I scraped the remainder of the strawberries into the bowl and I was lucky not to drop it. For a moment I was loathe to put the knife away, but I did so, brushing past Damon to drop it in the sink. He didn't make another sound until I was halfway towards the dining room. "Alex."

Turning back, I knew that a long time ago I would have liked to see him in my house, arms crossed and a curious expression on his face. It would have been a game then, a tease and nothing more. Not the serious challenge that glinted in his eyes, and not with the fear settling at the base of my skull. "Yeah?" My voice sounded normal, and I fervently thanked whatever gods were listening for that small gift.

"Your name. Is it short for Alexandria?" He asked it so offhandedly, and yet his eyes sharpened to daggers. I shivered on the inside. Ice did not cover the frigid cold running through my veins. I met those eyes with innocence playing in my own. No, ice did not cover it at all.

I tilted my head to the side and smiled slow and flirtatious, hating every minute of it. "Yeah, it is. But that's a mouthful. Let's stick to calling me Alex." And with that I turned on my heel, sashaying off as if I gave a damn about whether he was watching me walk away.

* * *

**Thus the plot begins to thicken! **

**If you have ideas for the next few chapters, PM me! I'd like to get some input on this **

**Also, it was asked that I give a bit of my Playlist for these guys away. I've decided I'll do this for every chapter, so here's the first!**

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Fire"__ by Lacuna Coil (main part of the entire chapter)_

"_Hanging On"__ by Ellie Goulding ft. Tinie Tempah (subtle romantic avenues and tension)_


	7. Worst Dinner Ever

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own Vampire Diaries or its delicious cast. Thankfully I do own Alex and her story, so please don't 'borrow' either of them! _

_Onto the chaos _

* * *

_Present_

A loud, somewhat obnoxious laugh rang through the dining room, courtesy of my father. Turns out he especially liked sarcastic undead dinner guests. Not that he knew about the undead part. But really, he's hasn't stopped laughing for longer than a few minutes before Damon got him going again. At least from across the table Stefan looked about as annoyed as I felt. "Hey Da, what do you think of Stefan's cooking?" I asked before the resident comedian could say anything else. Da's bright eyes turned to me, the smile still etched on his face. A small pang went through my stomach. He liked the Salvatores. I wish he could have befriended someone other than the paranormal monsters in town.

"It's delicious. Where did you learn to cook like this?" My father demanded, chortling as he took another bite of Stefan's work. It did smell 'delicious'. As of yet I had not taken a bite. Food prepared by a vampire turned my stomach, though I was doing a good job of pretending.

Stefan smiled easily, running a hand through his already tousled brown hair. "Here and there." Yeah, 'here and there' over the span of a century. He turned his eyes to me, smile still in place. "What do you think Alex? Not a fail?"

I was going to have to unscrew my smile tonight. Flashing yet another bright, all too cheery grin, I replied. "Absolutely mouthwatering." His own smile widened a bit as if in thanks.

"I'm sure Alex's dessert will make this look like fast food." Damon piped up from his place beside Da. He was smiling too, cocky and confidant. Was a compliment supposed to make my heart flutter? He acted as if it should.

"Of course it will." I quipped, flashing a decidedly more flirtatious grin. "In fact, I'll go grab it from the kitchen." Rising from my chair, I exited the dining room. My smile dropped the moment I was out of sight, cheeks tingling. This was perhaps the worst dinner I've ever had in my life. They couldn't know anything, and yet every time one of the vampires looked at me my spine stiffened and waited for them to lunge across the table for my throat.

The kitchen was cooler than the candlelit dining room, empty save for the strawberry shortcake resting on the counter. I had have wished that verveine still grew in the garden when I was icing it. But aside from ticking off the vampire who consumed it, Da would have been placed in a great amount of danger. Its appearance would have been enough evidence for them to assume I or he knew their secret. Leaning against the counter, I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose. How could I go through a dinner knowing that the guests were not only monsters, but that I needed to kill one of them? No wonder I had jumped when Stefan had passed the salt and accidently brushed my hand. It was worse than a caffeine high.

Lips twitching mildly at the sentiment, there was a reason I avoided caffeine, I grabbed the cake and made my way back into the dining room. Upon entering, I was seriously contemplating just killing Damon now. Or duct taping Da's mouth, because the moment I walked in I caught the end of their conversation. " –would love to show Alex around town tomorrow." Damon was saying graciously. Da was smiling as if he had just set up a very pleasing arrangement.

Eyebrows arched, I snapped the door shut loudly to gain their attention. The smile on Da's face faded a bit at my look. "Excuse me, do I now have plans for tomorrow?" I asked quietly, setting the cake in the center of the table and sitting with my eyebrows arched with interest.

"I was just suggesting the boys take you around town, you know, help get your bearings." Da looked uneasy as he answered.

Damon picked up after him, flashing the cocky grin again. "And I accepted the offer. Stefan's got a date, but I'm free and have nothing else to do." Goodie. Judging by the gleam in his eyes, he had more important idea on the matter. Suspicion bloomed in my chest as I cut the cake and offered Stefan a plate. I couldn't decline the offer, not after Da setting up. I was still trying to play the innocent new girl, and why would she say no anyways?

Silence fell as they waited for my response. I bided my time, letting Da stew. It was the least I could do, considering he had just made my life ten times more difficult. "That sounds nice. Thanks Damon." My tone was nothing shy of polite and sweet.

"You're more than welcome Alex." If only.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

The garden was still beautiful, even in Winter's depths. The snow covered vines glistened with the early sunlight that pierced through the clouds covering the sky. It was cold and quiet, the snow blanketing the world in silence. I was thankful for the soft warmth of the wool cloak wrapped around my frame. Stefan had said his brother was to be found out here, and there was only place I knew him to go in this garden.

I found him there, sitting on the bench where we had met months ago on a much warmer day. "Hullo Damon."

He turned, smiling quickly, though it faded after a moment. It then that worry settled in my heart. His smile had never faded, not for me. "Alexandria." Damon spoke softly, rising to wrap his arms around my waist and press a soft kiss to my lips. For a moment I felt I might cry, though the reason why escaped me.

I touched my hand to his cheek, concern kindling in my eyes. "Why are you out in the cold Damon?"

He sighed, taking my hand in his. "I had some things to think on Alexandria." His words were quiet and held foreboding.

It was no longer concern in my eyes, but fear. "Things to think on?" I echoed.

Damon nodded slowly, a curl of dark hair falling before his eyes. "The war, actually. I went to the recruiters today." Understanding struck; the war between the Union and the Confederacy had gone on for more than a year now. Soldiers were being called, men leaving their homes to fight for our freedom. I refused to believe what he was saying.

"The recruiters? You mean to serve then?" To leave me? I looked to the ground, pain spearing my heart.

A cool finger lifted my chin to meet glassy eyes. Damon smiled gently, "I'll be coming back Alexandria. I promise."

_Present_

"I'll be by tomorrow around nine." Damon said from the door, one hand in his pocket. Stefan was speaking with Da in the parlor about bringing over a girl named Elena next time we had dinner. I was sincerely hoping there was not going to be a next time, like it mattered how nice his girlfriend was.

Turning back to Damon, I rolled my eyes and put a hand on my waist. "Just don't be late. If you're getting me up that early there had better be coffee involved too Salvatore."

"I won't be late. Promise." Damon winked and glanced over my shoulder. "Come on Stefan, or you're walking." He called and a few seconds later Stefan appeared with Da talking animatedly at his side. The two grinned at something that was said before Stefan gave him a nod and stepped out the door with a wave to me. "See you later Alex." Damon caught my gaze again, his words more of a promise than the first ones had been before he turned and made his way off my porch.

When they finally were out of sight I sighed and shut the door, locking it though I knew it would do little good if they wanted back in. "I'll see you in the morning Da." I muttered under my breath before he could say anything, almost literally racing up the stairs to have a nice long freak out session in the safety of my room.

* * *

**This was a longer chapter…had a lot to fit in there. Anywho, rates welcome and suggestions would be loved **

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Brick by Boring Brick" - Paramore_


	8. Beyond Caring

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own any of the characters from Vampire Diaries or the series itself. Alex and her story are mine, please don't 'borrow' either of them._

* * *

_Present_

_Damon_

"She looked exactly like Alexandria, down to that fake smile she used to wear around her grandmother." Stefan said for the goddamn sixth time since we've been in the car. Next time I see the spitting image of one of my dead ex-girlfriends, I was not inviting him to dinner with her.

"Yes, she did." I said tightly, staring at the road ahead. Seeing Alex at the Council's little meeting today had been worse than first seeing Elena. Not by much, but it still was worse. I had thought someone might have poisoned the tea until she had started talking.

Stefan was quiet for a moment. I almost believed he was done with talking about it. Naturally he proved me wrong and decided to be more annoying than usual. "Do you think it's just a coincidence?" he asked quietly.

I turned away from the road long enough to give him the look he received when being particularly stupid. "Stefan, when are things like this ever a coincidence in our lives?" I asked rhetorically. He frowned at my snark, but to be honest I didn't care. We weren't given the luxury of 'coincidences'. "Did you get what I asked?"

Out of the corner of my eye I could see his frown deepen. "Yes." Good. We needed something of 'Alex's' in order to test out a theory of mine. Bonnie already should be at the border house with all her witchy accessories. I didn't thank Stefan and he fell into his usual moody silence until I pulled into the drive. "Damon?"

Damn. He had the curious, serious, and well-meaning brother face on. Sighing I tapped the steering wheel and glanced at him. "What Stefan?" I asked eyes narrowed.

"What if it is Alexandria?" he asked quietly, concern clear in his eyes. I hated when he got that look about. It was annoying. But he had struck the question of the hour. What if it was Alexandria? To be truthful, I wasn't sure what it would mean, besides a lot of drama.

"It would prove that my ex-girlfriends can't stay away from me. Or dead." I replied caustically, leaving the car and heading into the house before he could remark on that. It was more worrisome than I cared to admit, considering the past Alexandria and I had shared. Part of me was sincerely hoping that it really was a coincidence and that Alexandria was a family name passed down for generations and the new girl in town had hit the genetic lottery of looking exactly like the woman I had fallen in love with before Katherine. The rest of me was certain I'd never be that lucky. I remembered the look on Lenora Conner's face the day of Alexandria's funeral. There was nothing within me that doubted she wouldn't have done anything to get her revenge.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

"I'll be coming back Alexandria, I promise." My words did not appear to appease her, as her evergreen eyes glimmered with tears. She felt so small in my arms, so warm. I would miss her more than I thought possible on the battlefield.

"When do you leave?" she asked quietly.

"Tomorrow morning. I was about to come find you when you arrived." I was not going to leave without her seeing me. Part of me wished I did not feel honor bound to serve. Leaving now seemed more painful than losing Virginia to the Yankees. Alexandria bit her lip, resting her cheek against my shoulder.

She was silent for a moment. "Return in one piece Damon, or there will be hell to pay."

I could not help but grin at the sentiment. "I wouldn't dream of angering you by returning with a hair out of place!" She laughed quietly at that, and I chuckled along, tightening my hold around her waist. But too soon the laughter ceased and the clearing around us returned to the frigid silence of mid-Winter and Alexandria sighed against me, pain ringing in the sound. I looked down at her, tilting her chin up to meet my gaze. "Dearest Alexandria," I said seriously.

Her eyes met mine, and this time a tear fell. I brushed it gently aside, a half smile on my lips. "Yes Damon?" she asked, halfheartedly smiling back.

"Will you wait for me?" I asked, heart suddenly catching in my throat. And what if she were to decline? What if she-

_Alex_

"Will you wait for me?" he asked. I could see the worry in his eyes, the fear of a refusal. For a moment I was quiet, brows knit and lips pursed. I could wait for him. I would miss this warmth that suffused me every time his eyes caught mine. And I knew I could never dream of letting someone else replace it. But still I was silent. This was something greater than a stolen kiss or a murmured wish. This was a promise, were it to be made.

Damon made as if to move. I had been silent too long. Before he could withdraw, I returned the soft kiss he had given me moments ago, smiling as I drew away. "I will wait for you Damon." I said, my words as binding as any contract. He grinned, kissing me fervently before I could say anything more. When he broke it, leaving me lightheaded and heart racing, I managed a quick breath and gave him a serious look, though my smile remained in my eyes. "But I mean it, not a scratch."

_Present_

_Damon_

I should have been beyond caring after so long. Yet here I was letting the guilt get to me. Seeing 'Alex' had brought up memories best left forgotten. "Hurts, doesn't it?" Stefan watched from the couch, looking away from Bonnie as she worked. I gave him a dark smile.

"What hurts?" I asked, sarcasm oozing from my voice. Why would I admit anything? "Are you ready yet Bonnie?"

She glanced at me from her book, glaring. I only smiled thinly in response. "Yeah, I'm finished. You said this girl's name was Alex right?"

I nodded, arms crossed. As Bonnie began to mutter beneath her breath my thoughts went back to the cold clearing in eighteen sixty two.

_Alex_

The pen dropped with a loud 'clack', shattering the reverie I had placed myself in while writing. Warm tears were rolling down my cheeks. After all this time, how could it still hurt this much? I pressed my hands to my lips, stifling a sob. I had tried to forget that promise, but Damon's words at the door had brought the memory on whether I wanted it there or not. A resounding ache had started to pound throughout my body. Why had I been so stupid? So selfish?

Why did I have to remember?

And suddenly, a hot streak of anger ripped through my heart. Why did I even care?! The pages ripped easily from the notebook before the ink could even dry. Tears still falling, I tore the evidence to shreds. Why did I care? Why should I care? HOW could I still care?! The small white pieces fell to the floor as another sob left my lips.

"Goddamn you Damon Salvatore." I shuddered, falling onto my bed and curling up into a ball, clutching at the comforter. He should have rotted in Hell.

* * *

**Oh man…this one made me feel angry while writing it. Anyways, first attempt at writing for Damon and his memories of Alex! Drama is about to explode in the story! Stay tuned and drop me a line if you've got comments or ideas!**

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Don't You Remember" – Adele _

"_Pressure" – Paramore _


	9. Foreshadowing

_**Disclaimer!**__ I do not own the Vampire Diaries or its cast (sadly) Alex and her story, however, are mine. Please do not 'borrow' either of them!_

* * *

_Present_

_Alex_

_The cabin was cold and empty. It was never cold here, never. Always a fire burned in the grate. Always a warm embrace waited for me, accompanied by glass green eyes that stole my breath away. But neither awaited me as I stepped into the dark parlor. Shivering, I moved to light the fire. _

"_Alexandria." The voice was quiet, hard. Yet within it I could hear desire. My heart pounded as I turned to the door._

_A small smile touched my lips. "Damon, I didn't think you would be here." Why wouldn't he? This place was ours._

_He smiled, and all to suddenly my blood ran cold. "I came to see you Alexandria." At this my smile widened, but my heart pounded haphazardly in my chest. Some small part of me said this was wrong. Alarm spread like poison through my veins and his eyes widened, innocent and beguiling. "Why, Alexandria are you scared?" A chuckle left his lips. "Why? Are you hiding something from me dearest?" Damon stepped towards me, and hurriedly I took a step back, finding a wall in my way. _

"_N-no." I whispered. I wasn't hiding anything from him. I would never hide anything from him. Why would I?_

"_Really?" In a blur he was before me, arms caging me between his chest and the wall. _

_I gasped as his cold fingers clamped around my wrists. "How did y-'' I managed before he squeezed. A hiss of pain was tugged from lips as he snarled. _

"_You're lying." Damon growled. My heart was pounding now, so hard I could scarcely catch my breath. _

"_D-Damon stop!" _

"_Tell the truth Alex!" he snapped. _

_Alex?! He never called me Alex! I squirmed, trying to seek purchase, and suddenly found myself slammed into the wall. Stars sprouted in my eyes as I caught sight of bright red eyes and a flash of gleaming white. "D-Damon!"_

"_Too late…" he whispered, voice a caress, before pain bloomed at my throat._

"Jesus Christ!" I shot form the bed, covers flying and a hand at my throat. Quickly I scanned across the room as my breathing slowed. No one was standing over my bed; there wasn't so much as a sign of a vampire anywhere. It was a dream. Just a dream…quite possibly the worst dream ever. But it was not a memory. Somehow it felt more realistic than some of the flashbacks I've had before. Head aching, I pulled myself from the bed and located my cellphone. It was seven in the morning. How had I managed to sleep in that late? Did jet lag hit me late? Ugh, and I could use another hour or so of sleep. I didn't have anything important to do toda-

Damn.

Damon Salvatore was playing tour guide for me today. Goodie…My headache suddenly reached migraine proportions. Groaning, I hit the pillows and debated the sick card. Da would let me stay in bed, right?

_Damon_

"Are you sure this will work Bennett?" I sneered doubtfully from the front door. I had someplace to be in ten minutes, but I'd rather have a clarification on certain things before I left.

Bonnie was packing her things from the spell she had performed last night in the living room, looking unhappy about being around me as per usual. "It'll work Damon. At least, it will if she's this Alexandria chick you keep mumbling under your breath about."

"I do not mumble." Well not too often at least. But her answer was suitable enough. "Let's hope for the best then." I tossed over my shoulder, giving a small gesture of farewell before leaving the boarding house. At the moment, I wasn't entirely certain what the 'best' outcome of this could be.

The Conner place had been under lock and key since Stephan and I had returned to Mystic Falls. Never once had I even thought about taking a peek inside. Not until Alex had stopped by at a Founder's meeting… The speedometer jacked up a good ten miles per an hour at the thought of the redhead. I was praying, well no, not praying as I don't do that sort of thing…Alright so I was hoping that there was a logical explanation to this crap. But it made more sense in the world I lived in for magic to have a hand in this mess. Still, if this Alex was an innocent girl who looked like my ex, I'd be much happier. And as much as I hated to admit it, I would probably be a helluva lot safer too.

Glaring out the window, I pulled into the Conner's place and parked. Taking Alex out was the best way to keep an eye on her. Especially if she did have a past in Mystic Falls. A tour around town might trigger something, and I wouldn't be missing it. Stoic, I knocked on the door and placed my characteristic smirk on my lips as it opened. Glancing down, I was certainly glad that in this era, woman wore tank tops and tight jeans. Well, at least I was until I caught her glare. The animosity in it would do Katherine proud. But it was only there for a moment before she smiled and stepped outside.

_Alex_

Jesus. I heard the car pull into the drive just as I downed a good four aspirin and was putting my shoes on. I was actually hoping he had coffee with him. Much to my disappointment, when I opened the door, he was smirking without coffee. The moment I glanced at him the nightmare returned in full force and I couldn't stop myself from glaring at him with what hate I was able to muster without coffee in my system. And then I remembered that this century Alex didn't hate Damon. He was her tour guide, she was supposed to like Damon. I switched the flip and smiled, shutting the door behind me as I stepped onto the porch. "No coffee? You disappoint me."

Damon smirked. "We'll grab some on the way." I only smiled a little wider, the headache making the act more painful than usual.

"Let's get going then!" The sooner we started, the sooner I'd get the damn day over with.

* * *

**Well, there's that chapter. Cannot wait to add in the full scale chaos in the next one! Anyone like the nightmare scene?! Drop me comments, ideas, or criticism any time!**

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Eden Echo" – Kamelot_


	10. Ultimatum

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own Vampire Diaries or its drool worthy cast! However, Alex and her story is mind, so please do not 'borrow' her._

* * *

_Present_

_Alex_

It would have been easier to despise this outing if Damon didn't drive a gorgeous car. The pristine '69 Camaro made my heart flutter…Then again, that might have been a reaction to Damon's curious looks every once in awhile. His cool gaze would land on me as if he expected something to happen. It was creepy, but hanging out with the undead was always creepy.

The ten minute drive from my place to town was silent, and I liked it that way. Sadly, it could not last. Damon opened the door to the coffee shop that once was a trading post. Walking in, I half expected the old post master to be in a corner mumbling about the War. Instead I saw the smiling face of a young waitress, who at seeing Damon, blushed a bright pink. Ugh, fan girls.

"This way." She gestured, pointing to a booth. I did not miss the flirtatious look she gave Damon. A surge of annoyance shot through me. I'm sure she'd love to end up as his lunch. I wondered how many people Damon has killed since living here…how many has he killed in a life time?

"Alex, what are you thinking about?" Damon queried, brows arched with mild amusement.

Flippantly I sat in the book and glanced at the menu. "I was wondering how many girls you brought here." was my reply. Despite how much I hated being here, I was a tiny, miniscule bit curious.

He grinned. "Only a few."

Uh huh. The waitress returned and I ordered. This was awkward, because I know once I had looked at him, doe eyed, the way she did right now. Staring at the coffee she placed before me, I suddenly felt nauseated. "So, why'd you end up in Mystic Falls?" Damon asked, taking a sip of the drink he ordered.

Fingertips tracing the cup rim, I gave him an honest answer. "Because Da' wanted to move the company to America."

"Why Mystic Falls though, not NYC or LA? They seem a better choice." He sipped his coffee again, eyes speculative.

Personally, I was guessing Fate had something to do with it. I looked up to meet his gaze. Grim silence was my reply. I believe Fate had sent me here, influenced Da', so that I could break an endless cycle that the vampire had put me on. Not, of course, that I would tell Damon that. He looked uncomfortable at my silence and I smiled. "I think to fulfill the desire of returning to the American homestead." I said easily, taking a sip of the latte and thoroughly enjoying the odd look crossing his features.

"Right, you had ancestors here, founders I think. Hm…It was Lenora and…Alexandria, right? Must be a family name." he tapped his fingers on the table top. "Least that's what the town archives say." Cold rushed to my fingertips, his eyes suddenly sharp.

I savored another sip, or pretended to, as the coffee now tasted like ashes. "Yeah, it's a family name. I've got a picture someplace. Gran says I look just like me."

_Damon_

Yes, just like her. If I was right, this _was_ her. But she certainly wasn't acting like Alexandria. This woman was far too moody. And she certainly didn't dress how Alexandria would have in this age…definitely not, not with the amount of cleavage she exposed. Not that I minded, but Alexandria had been mindful of such things. But then, people change after a hundred years—I knew that full well. For a moment I fell silent, watching her sip coffee.

If this was Alexandria, why was she really back here? It was not for her father—if Sean Conner really was her father. It could not be anything good. Brewing that idea, the silence lengthened until we finished coffee.

"Well, shall we?" I offered my arm and rose from the table. She gingerly took it and we strolled to the streets of the old side of town. I watched her, but saw no recognition at the shops that still stood. I saw no flash in her eyes at the place where Alexandria and I would meet in town: the garden at the old Apothecary. She remained curious, green eyes wandering about, occasionally asking questions. Anyone could act, I took it as such. I would know if she was Alexandria soon enough.

"Here, I want you to see something." I steered her away from the main road, passing through what was once a dirt path that was stilled lined with trees, and stopped at an old wooden gate. It wasn't the original gate—time had taken that one many years ago. Alex seemed uneasy as I pushed it open and revealed the hidden square that even now high school students called 'the kissing corner'. Beside me Alex exhaled slowly.

_Alex_

Had I been innocent and new to town, I would have loved Damon's attentions. He was the perfect guide, offering tidbits on the historical sights of the original Mystic Falls. At one point I beamed at him and gave a coy smile. "How do you know all this?"

He shrugged and brushed it off. "I read a lot. History is interesting." Yes, especially when you lived it.

Yet, the moment he spoke of a surprise, I suddenly wanted to run, even more than I had wanted to when I first saw him in the Lockwood kitchen. Smiling and fighting the urge to scream, I followed him down a side road. A gate appeared, weathered and bent, and in a flash I knew where we were.

Cotton and oak trees still lined the square, grassy Eden growing in the middle of town. Centered, the weeping willow still curved. A gasp hitched in my throat. Damon pulled me into the square and I, knees shaking, followed. "They call this the kissing corner." Damon was saying.

I knew this. It was here, beneath the shade of the willow, that he first kissed me. The memory burned bright, tugged from where it had been hidden for so many years. A breeze blew through the clearing, as soft as his lips had been against mine. The willow dominated my vision and a thick, unyielding sense of invasion struck. Suddenly I couldn't breathe. Before I lost myself to a cloud of darkness, I saw Damon's eyes as he caught me. They blazed with shock, fear, triumph…and something more. Distantly I heard him speak. "Alex—'' and then I was gone.

_Damon_

Bonnie had said a strong emotional bond tied to a place was needed for the revealing spell to work. For both parties…Alexandria had nearly wept when first I had kissed her, and I remember my own reaction to the kiss. It would do, Bonnie had said. She had looked doubtful, probably not believing that I had cared as much as I had said.

As Alex took in the clearing, I remembered the soft feeling of Alexandria's lips on mine. I remembered the quiet sigh when she responded. When Alex swayed, I remembered what it was to hold Alexandria, and when _Alex_ fell, I caught her and I knew. For a moment her eyes caught mine. There was fear in them, and some part of me knew she had every right to fear me. "Alexandria." I breathed as she fell limp in my arms.

How had this happened? Lenora's look of hatred at the funeral in eighteen sixty four flashed behind my eyes. _How,_ I did not know. But _why_, that I did know. Because once before, Alexandria had fallen in my arms, pale and still. Except last time she had been lifeless, and no matter how many times I called to her, those eyes would never reopen again.

I knew what this was. Chance? No. A threat, a warning—no. This was an ultimatum.

* * *

**Finally got to right some revealing there! Spoiler, next chapter holds a LOT more angst! Comments, suggestions, critiques welcome!**

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Love Song" – Cruel Black Dove_


	11. Truth to Light: P1

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own any of the Vampire Diaries characters! But Alex is mine, I ask that you do not 'borrow' her or her story!_

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

_Alex_

"Damon, where are we going?" Eyes were on us now as the townspeople noted Damon Salvatore and his childhood friend Alexandria O'Conner walking arm in arm through the heat baked streets of Mystic Falls. It was the gossip of September. What, they asked, was going on _there_?

Damon gave a small nod to Jonathan Gilbert as he passed. "Alexandria, why so impatient?" he grinned, the soft pressure of his hand on my arm increasing for a moment. A small pout crossed my features. Oh his games, what a nuisance.

"You know I hate surprises." I said, haughtily pulling out my fan to hide the small smile he always managed to pull from me, no matter my stubborn will.

"Oh I think you'll quite like this one." Damon murmured, turning from the main square and down the old dirt road carriages had long since ceased passing through.

I arched a brow, giving him a superior look. "Oh will I?"

"Yes." He said simply, stopping before a high stone fence where a wooden gate leaned from the wall.

"What is this place?" I queried as he pushed it open. A small gasp left my lips as the hidden Eden was revealed. Damon flashed me a smile, pulling me inside and beneath the cool shade of a weeping willow. I wondered, how had this place been hidden to me? Wouldn't the whole town speak of it? Yet as Damon reached to touch my cheek, such thoughts faded to focus on the determined expression in his glass green eyes. "Damon…?"

And then he was kissing me, soft and warm lips pressed to mine. I sighed, pressing closer, and—

_Present_

I woke with a thick, buzzing headache hammering in my skull. Blearily I reached for the bottle of water I always kept by my bed, and instead found a cold hand. Immediately my eyes shot open, and I lunged from the…couch? Pulse pounding, I notice two things. One, I was in the Salvatore house—for a moment I thought to be in a dream, except Damon Salvatore was smiling coldly at me from his place a foot away, dressed not in breeches, but in jeans and a t-shirt.

Fear skittered down my spine. That look in his eyes…the corner…the fainting…he knew. "Hello Alexandria."

I booked it for the door, but he was already there, looking furious and bored all in one. Automatically I reached for magic, attacking his mind, but finding it blocked. Damon smirked and cocked his head to one side. "Something wrong _Alex?_" he whispered.

Slowly I backed away, but his vampire speed beat me to the exit. A ridged hand locked around my wrist. The air left my lungs in a rush as I was slammed into a wall. Damon towered above me, eyes glittering fiercely, something primal burning at their core. "How are you alive?!" he demanded, hand tightening. I gritted my teeth, knowing a bruise would be there tomorrow. If I made it to tomorrow that is. "How?!" he snapped, the planes of his face jagged.

A rush of power left me, knocking him away—sliding across the floor. I was breathing hard, chest heaving. "How?!" I shrieked, barely recognizing my voice. Pointing a finger, I watched as he flew into the wall where moments ago I was caged. "HOW!?" Striding towards him, I maliciously sent a jab at his side, magic sparking. "This is your fault Damon Salvatore!" I snapped, watching the feral look cross his features. He was struggling not to lose himself to the vampire. "I am here because of you!"

His eyes widened and he pushed against the magic to step towards me. I slammed him back into the wall. "H-how is this my fault?" he wheezed out.

Slowly I smiled cold and bitter as a winter night. "Because you killed me." Abruptly my magic wavered and fell as a look of absolute shock flashed across his face—about as fast as it took him to pin me down again.

"You should still be dead then." He inflected; deadpan.

"And see how well that worked out." I glowered with venom in my words and ice in my eyes as my hands clasped around the fists that held me fast.

_Damon_

I have never seen hatred like this. Not even with Katherine and all of her crazy bitch moments. I had never thought I would see it with Alexandria, whose memories had never held a single moment of anger. And here she was, hard as steel and giving me a look that had I not been dead, would have killed. This was not my Alexandria.

"How exactly did this work out?" I asked quietly, eyes slits. Magic, the only answer was magic. But of what sort? She was not a vampire, and could not be immortal. That…that Bonnie would have sensed. She remained quiet, the features that once had been so open to me now closed and frigid. Alexandria gave me only a look of contempt. "I will find out Alex." I threatened, hands tightening around her wrists again. She winced, and for a moment remorse tainted my resolve.

"You won't find out unless you kill me again Damon. And even then, I'd sure as hell make that as difficult as possible." She hissed.

I hid the bitterness that statement brought. "So melodramatic. You should just tell me now, save the trouble." I replied candidly back.

Suddenly a look entirely inhuman replaced her pain. Hard, sharp, and terrible she bared her teeth in a grin. A pain shot through my body, worse than mind magic, and I dropped her. Alex stood over me as I crumpled to meet the floor. Through the gray lines of pain I caught her words: "Make me." before she strode out of the manor.

The pain faded soon after. My jaw unlocked slowly, canines extended. It took my body longer. I wonder if that was what being tased felt like for a vampire. Frowning, I blurred to my feet and reached the brandy, pouring a glass and staring at the glass in my hand. I was going to have to 'make her'. Otherwise, I was pretty sure I'd end up dead.

Well, the permanent kind of dead anyways.

* * *

**Well, there be the chapter. I'm splitting into a few parts because it was getting a wee bit long! Anywho, critiques, ideas, and compliments welcome! **

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Not Ready to Make Nice" – Dixie Chicks_


	12. Truth to Light: P2

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own Vampire Diaries or its cast! Alex is mine, and I ask that you not use her or her story!_

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 1864_

_Alex_

I watched him go, the Confederate Army Soldier who took my heart with him. Damon would leave for training, and he would not be home for quite some time. I prayed that he would return safe and whole, and that battle would leave him unscathed. It was spring now.

I did not see him again for two years. By then, I knew him to be lost to me. The letters had ceased a year ago, and before then they had started to dwindle in length-distant and cold. Yet when Grandmother spoke of his return, I raced to the carriage station.

I had dressed in my finest, a ribbon at my neck, smile touching my lips. It was all for naught. Damon stepped out of the carriage, my breath had caught, and then my pulse began to pound. Stepping out from behind him came a young woman, her smile as beautiful as a painting's, and her eyes as dark as night. Something cold clutched at my heart and I quaked. Damon smiled at her, a smile once that would have left me breathless. The woman took his arm, and he led her away, his eyes glancing over me as he passed.

It was his eyes that stripped away my resolve. They were blank as they passed over me. I saw no tenderness in them, I saw no soft remembrance. I saw no love.

_Present_

His hand clasped around my wrist, vice like and cold. Glass eyes glinted, and Damon demanded answers. I couldn't hear him, not with the rushing sense of 'danger' in my veins. The magic rose, fierce and protective and sprang from my skin into Damon.

He dropped like a stone.

_'Release him now!' _part of me screamed. The rest of me, the magic in me, hissed _'No!' _I could feel the sharpness in my smile as I watched him crumple. The magic screamed to kill him, and kill him so he would stay dead. He deserved it, an eye for an eye. And then, damn the gods, I remembered.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

The cabin was warm, the sizzle-snap of the fire the only sound in the parlor room. It wasn't the fire keeping me warm though. It was the arms around my waist and the teasing breath on my neck that sent heat spiraling down my spine. We had no will to leave this place, while outside winter claimed the countryside. Here in Damon's arms, it was the sweet embrace of early spring.

His fingertips touched my cheek, lifting my eyes to meet his. A serious smile touched his lips and in the firelight his eyes gleamed, the dark waves of hair falling across his brow in a boyish fashion. He was charming and handsome. In the amber glow of the firelight, he took my breath away.

"Alexandria," he whispered, fingertips teasing against my cheekbone.

"Mm?" I cocked my head to one side, curls sliding down my shoulder. He caught one, wrapping it around his finger. A serious expression played on his face. For a moment my pulsed jumped. What was he thinking of, that made him so somber and decisive?

His hand cupped my cheek, smooth and soothing. "I love you Alexandria."

My breath caught. "W-what?" Did he truly just…My heart was fluttering like a hummingbird.

"I love you."

_Present_

I released him. The magic screamed to kill him, and I should have. Damon needed to die, or I would never get out of this hell hole of rebirth. But I could not bring myself to do it. Jesus, why did I need to have morals now!? Once he had loved me. I released him, my anger barely controlled. "Make me." I hissed, and ran before the magic could take me again.

I did not make my way home from the Salvatore house. As soon as Damon was down—writhing in pain, I was out the door and running. The nerve spell would give me minutes before his vampire body began to rework the fried endings. So I ran, heart racing and deafening, magic still blazing through my veins and mingling with adrenaline into my own personal energy drink.

Gods, he _knew_! How?! It involved magic, it had to. Where did he have a witch hiding? I would not be so ill prepared again, but the question remained. I knew Mystic Falls had just become far more dangerous—for myself and Da'. There was the matter of Damon Salvatore knowing my identity, yes. But there was also the matter of the magic thrashing through my body. It had never felt like this, so violent and wild. Not until I attacked Damon. This change held nothing good within it.

For a moment there, I had felt out of control. Why?

It was not the question burning through me though. It pained me to admit it, but I knew Damon once had loved me. He had broken me, he had killed me for the Goddess's sake! But once he had loved me. I had thought I was beyond caring. Now, now I was wondering…

Please, Ceridwen, don't let it be so. I couldn't love him again.

I wouldn't.

_Damon_

"Damon!? Damon, what the hell happened?!"

Stefan's face appeared in the dim circled of my vision. He was concerned, if I been able to move, I would have punched the concern from his face. That was a problem, as right now my limbs felt like concrete and a buzzing was spreading through my fingertips. I could smell the sage scent of Alex still in the air—the smell that had appeared when she tased me with magic.

"Come on." Stefan took my arm and somehow shouldered me to the couch. He offered a decanter of blood, and even that was hard for me to swallow. I felt like a horde of bees had stung my tongue and throat. "I take it you were correct?" Stefan finally asked.

I blanched. "More than I wanted to hope."

He arched a brow in that annoying manner of his. "Alexandria Conner, alive and back in Mystic Falls." Stefan paused, tapping his fingertips together thoughtfully. "Do you know why she's here?"

No, not really. But the look she had given me had read murder. I figured it was as good a guess as any. ""No, but I could bet it isn't anything good. After all, she knew us before we knew her. Judging by the zap she gave me, her witchy family taught her some tricks she didn't have in eighteen sixty two. She had to at least have a guess about what we are." My bet—she knew a lot more than I was comfortable with.

Exhaling, Stefan gave me a hard look. I pointedly ignored it, staring at the A Positive in my hand like it was the most interesting thing in the world. He seemed to be waiting for me to say something. Another sigh. He was getting good at the whole brooding thing. It worked for him. "Well what are you going to do about it?"

Good question Stefan. I rose, sipping the blood before casting him a smirk. "What I normally do."

"And that is?" he asked, sounding worried.

"Whatever I want to." I shrugged, flashing him a grin before heading outside. I found myself at the crumbling stone bench where Alexandria had sat the summer of eighteen sixty two. Despite my cocky reply, I knew Stefan had cause to worry, and so did I. 'Alex' was the new rogue witch in town, one with a very good reason to exact a vendetta on our little family here.

That thought in mind, I settled onto the worn bench and stared at the robin's egg blue sky. Clouds were on the horizon, and all that crap about bad omens had me thinking: Something was coming….

I didn't have time to worry about it. There was a pissed off ex to contend with—before she somehow managed to turn me into a toad…or worse.

* * *

**Whew...had writer****'s block for waaaay too long. Sorry 'bout that!  
**

**** _"Don't You Remember" - Adele_


	13. Messages

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own Vampire Diaries or its characters. But Alexandria and her story are mine. Plase do not 'borrow' them!_

* * *

_Present_

_Alex_

It was quiet in the house when I arrived. "Da?" I called, making my way towards the kitchen. A note was taped to the fridge, written in Da's neat hand.

"_Alex, _

_Gone to Carol's. Big meeting at the Lockwood's. See you at supper._

_-Dad"_

Perfect. A Founder's meeting, likely their induction of him to the Council no one was supposed to know about. At least he should be safe from the vampires. Tiredly, I headed to the parlor and poured a glass of scotch. I'd given up on following drinking laws after living in the twenties. Settling into a recliner, I gave a quiet groan. Now, the twenties. Those had been some fun. Mafia running about, emigration to America, and the Flappers! Oh, I'd wanted to be a Flapper Girl. That of course, had not been respectable for a good Catholic girl. It had been nice in that era. There had never been thoughts about Damon, I was innocent of my memories for the longest time.

The alcohol burned a trail down my throat, burning away some tension. A headache was brewing behind my eyes, the sort that hailed from an oncoming storm. An autumn storm. My lips quirked up into a half smile, decanter frozen at my lips. Autumn storms were the bringers of chaos and the dying season to come. I almost could have laughed. Fate's humor was dry as ever.

_Damon_

The Founders had gathered at the Lockwood's again. Tyler was out, and Carol seem excited to be bringing in the Conner family back into the fold. Around the oak table, jokingly termed the 'Round Table', members were chatting quietly. "Damon, late? That's not like you." Carol smiled as I entered.

I returned her greeting with a swift flash of a grin. "Had a prior engagement."

Her eyes sparked at that, interest clear. "Oh yes, with Alexandria right? Michael said you were giving her a tour."

"Uhm hm." Was my reply as I settled into a seat not far from John Gilbert's. The door opened and in walked Alex's father. I wondered if he knew about is daughter, or about me. Judging by the look on his face, the answer was no. He looked shell shocked and smelled of confusion, eyes flickering back to Carol constantly. She must have told him already.

"Welcome to the Council." John smiled—his usual sharp look cutting through Michael's wary mask. The rest of the Council began to greet him as one of their own, while my thoughts were a hundred years away.

_Mystic Falls, 1862_

Katherine remained at the manor house the first few weeks of her arrival. Her presence was a mystery in town, and it was I alone who knew more than the whispered gossip. I would spend all my days with her, but father's anger at my leaving the army had boiled over and driven me from the house. I needed the escape.

The town had not changed over the past few years. Still the shops bustled with their chattering folks, key on gossip and goods. Eyes followed me as I strolled. I smirked. And then, a high, lofty laugh—familiar and sweet, caught my ear. I turned and caught sight of Alexandria, smiling on the arm of George Lockwood. I could not help it, I stared. She looked happy, cheeks pink and eyes twinkling. George chuckled alongside her, his arm twined through hers. A sudden surge of jealousy through me. Her eyes passed over me, and for a moment she looked as if to stop. But she didn't, the familiar emerald gaze dimmed and continued on, speaking quietly with George.

_Present_

I had returned home to Katherine that night, and for months Alexandria remained far from my thoughts. I had to feel guilty for it now?!

"Damon?"

I blinked, the reverie broken as Michael stepped over to me with an uneasy smile. "Welcome to the Council Michael." I smiled, automatic.

He chuckled, running a hand through his sandy hair. "Thank ye." His clear blue eyes settled on me, keen and kind. I liked Michael, he wasn't as stuffy as the other Founders. He knew how to laugh. "How did th' tour go?"

Terrible. "Great. Grabbed some coffee and walked around town." I lied.

He looked relieved. "Good, I was hoping you'd hit it off. Something told me you might. And she needs a friend."

God…Michael looked so hopeful. He had to be innocent. Ridiculously so. My smile wasn't as easy this time. If only he knew just how well we had hit off…and then how well we had fallen apart. "Yeah, I'd be glad to help her out anytime."

"I'm sure she'll appreciate that."

Oh yeah. Completely.

_Alex_

"Alex?!"

"Mphf!" I rolled from the couch and came face to face with the floor. "Ow…" I muttered, gingerly picking myself up from the floor just as Da' entered the den.

"What did ye do?" he guffawed, chuckling and running a hand through his russet hair.

"Just…you know…taking a nap." Jet lag still hadn't faded, thanks to the sleepless nights I've been having. "How'd your meeting go?"

"It was good." He smiled, rubbing his neck as he made a move towards the liquor cabinet. "Damon said the tour went well." He added nonchalantly.

I froze. Damon, on the Council? A vampire on the Council?! "He did?" I asked carefully, hiding the surprise that had to have been clear on my face moments ago.

"Uhm hm." Da' nodded, sipping at his brandy. "Said he showed you around the town an' a quaint little clearing."

The clearing? He hadn't shown me the…I looked at Da', really looked at him, and saw the dim look in his eyes and the dazed way he moved. "He did?" I repeated.

"O' course he did. Said it was a right pretty place. Said he found it a long time ago an' that you should meet him there." Da' went on, smiling bemusedly. His eyes were dilated, and he might be acting normal, but Da' never drank brandy. He was a Jack man, always. My gaze narrowed. Compulsion. I should have expected it, but the Council ought to have been sage from vampires.

"I guess I'll just go meet him then. Get some sleep Da'." I smiled at him and kissed his cheek while the anger began to brew. Damon was messing around where he shouldn't.

It was going to get him killed.

* * *

**Thus concludes this chapter! Next up, some fights and angst, dreams and nightmares, and more! **

_**Theme Song:**_

"_Better That We Break" – Maroon Five_


	14. Tell Me, Why?

_**Disclaimer!**__ I do not own Vampire Diaries or any of its lovely characters! However, Alex and her story are mine. Please do not 'borrow' them._

* * *

_Present_

_Alex_

Dusk had fallen by the time I peeled out of the drive way in the Mustang. It was stupid, but I felt safer in the car with a roof over my head than on the bike. When I reached the forest the moon was rising. Sighing, I stared out the windshield at the woods. Once I had rushed into them without thinking, without breathing, without caring. Whether it was noon or nightfall, I had ran through the woods with my heart fluttering. For Damon. Now I was walking in them for Da', and running to Damon was the last thing on my mind. My heart was fluttering, but not for him. _Danger,_ it said. Yeah, I might have been walking into a trap, but I had to, for Da'.

Leaving the car felt like leaving sanctuary. I wished that I carried stakes around like breath mints. Damon would have seen it though; he probably expected one. Still, there were plenty of branches in the clearing. I didn't need the damn stake. Shrugging into my jacket, I kept my focus on the possible trap ahead and made my way north.

The path was second nature, I took its weaves and turns without thought. The woods were silent. I had tread within them too many times to make a sound. I wondered at the silence. Not even an owl hooted. Were the woods waiting with baited breath to see the old lovers quarrel in the clearing once their own sanctuary? I scowled, stuffing my hands into my jacket pockets at the thought. This was not a Shakespearean sonnet.

Damon was waiting for me when I broke from the path and entered the clearing. I wish I had it in me to turn his gorgeous face into something hideous…with whiskers. All of the hated memories returned, achingly potent as he turned to give me a small, cynical smile. "Alexandria."

I came to a stop far away from him, arms crossed and a surly expression on my face. "It's Alex in this life, Damon."

He shrugged, as at ease and smug as usual. "Alexandria is prettier. I never called you Alex."

His words brought back the nightmare, his teeth at my throat. I shivered. A cold breeze blew, hiding my reaction. "What do you want Damon?" I asked tersely.

"I'd like to why you are here, Alexandria." He said it as if it was the most logical thing in the world.

"I'm here because a psychotic ex of mine compelled my father to send me out in the middle of nowhere, right I might add, as a storm was coming in." I replied, oozing fake cheer. A smile was screwed onto my face.

Damon pressed a hand to his chest, mock surprise in his eyes. "Ouch, was that supposed to hurt?"

"You don't have a soul, so I'm thinking not."

His eyes darkened. The vampire blurred, and suddenly he was before me. I expected the move this time, and refused to jump even though my body was skittish as a colt. He leaned down, lips an inch from mine. I hated myself for leaning closer as his fingertips touched my cheek. Tingles raced down my skin. I hated my body for betraying me. "Why are you really here, Alexandria?" he breathed.

I froze, and memories swarmed into a PTSD mash up from Hell. Why was I here?

Flickers from that night so many years ago, when Stefan knocked on the manor door with his eyes wild and frantic, returned. _"He needs you." _Three words said and I was running to the cabin. Damon had caught me there. His lips had been close to mine then, too. His touch had been feather light and gentle like it was now. He had leaned in close and pressed a kiss to my cheek, sweet and tender. He had kissed me, only moments later, he killed me.

Why was I here?! Because I hated him. _Everything_ was his fault. I gave him the most spiteful glare I could and he stepped back, expecting magic. It was roiling in me too, I could feel the magic trying to escape. I pushed it back. "I'm here, Damon Salvatore," I hissed, tempted to flay him alive. "because you killed me." The magic snapped and a loud _crack_ sounded as a branch shattered from a tree and appeared in my hand. I lunged and—

_Damon_

"…because you killed me!"

Venom dripped from her words. The same reason she was alive, because it was _my _fault. That did not stop me from moving to restrain her. The animal instincts screamed for me to kill her. She made no sound as I grabbed her wrists, and that frightened me. Alex, silent. Silence from her was dangerous. The instincts clawed at my coherent thoughts. I shoved them aside and slammed her into a tree.

She was livid, trapped between my chest and the oak trunk behind her. Pale, but for the bright green of her eyes and rage oozed from her. I could smell the magic on her, sharp and brittle as pine. There was no searing pain. Instincts racing, screaming, tearing, I leaned in close. The familiar prick of the fangs drove me on, and I did not stop until I heard a strangled gasp. My thoughts slammed back to reality, canines grazing the soft white of her throat.

I froze. Alexandria was breathing hard, pulse jumping tantalizing dance—swift as a hummingbird's. Slowly, human speed, I sheathed the fangs and caught her gaze. So many emotions flashed through her eyes and the tension suddenly crackled between us. It was tangible, potent, and burning. The stake clattered to the ground, but I was focused on Alexandria and her wide emerald eyes. I used to get lost in those eyes. Now they frightened me. Her pulse hammered and suddenly I wanted to hold her and calm her. "Alex—''

_Alex_

I could scarcely breathe as Damon slammed me into the tree. Bright red bloomed in my vision and pain lanced through my body. The sharp scent of sap and the warm spice of Damon warred with my senses. A jolt raced through my stomach. Where was the sharp pain at my throat? Where was the ripping sensation? No, there was no pain. His fangs touched my neck, but they were soft. Damon froze. The pressure of the fangs suddenly disappeared.

His eyes met mine. My heart lurched. Gods, those eyes.

"Alex—" he began. I didn't wait to hear him. I slammed magic into him as hard as I could. Damon dropped like a stone. I didn't stop and watch him writhe. I didn't grab the stake and finish him, but I should have. I ran. For the second time that day I ran, with Damon on the ground behind me.

* * *

**And, thus ends another chapter. Things will get more complicated soon…and of course, the drama will continue! Rate, review, comment, ideas? Let me know watcha thought!**

_**Theme Song:**_

"_Don't Speak" – No Doubt_


	15. Drink, Breathe, Repeat

_**Disclaimer! **__I do not own Vampire Diaries or its characters! But Alex and her story are mine, please do not use them._

* * *

_Present_

_Alex_

"_What are you doing here Damon?" I asked quietly, wary as a soft wind blew across the clearing. It is beautiful tonight; starry skies shining down on a warm summer's eve, the moon gilding the forest in quicksilver. He is beautiful too, a shadow of winter, dark hair tousled and green eyes vibrant. He made my heart flutter._

_His smile was slow. "Don't you remember Alex? This place is ours." Damon chided gently. So it was, and how I wished we no longer shared it. I would forget this place, but it holds some small part of me that was not bitter and resigned. A memory of Alexandria—my life so many years ago—when I was happy and sweetly content. _

"_You left it." I replied back, lips numb. The resounding words behind it filled the clearing. He left it and he left me. Something akin to…was it remorse that crossed through his eyes? _

_The soft breeze lifted the long grass as if in an inhale as Damon moved closer to me. I did not move, eyes flickering with accusation. He stopped before me. "Cannot you forgive me, dearest Alexandria?" he whispered softly, thumb brushing along my cheekbone; feather light and intoxicating. My breath caught while longing speared my heart. But I could see the teasing in his eyes, those beautiful, treacherous eyes, and pulled back with my temper flaring. _

_ "Goodbye, Damon." I snapped, turning from him and towards my car. A hand caught my wrist and pulled me close. I should not have hoped to be let go without a hassle. _

_ Damon was not smiling when I locked my jaw and looked back. His free hand went around my waist, something new burning in his eyes. Anxiety flared in my stomach. I could hurt him if I had to! "Let me go Damon!" The words were a warning and a demand in one. His hand left my wrist and I made to leave his grasp until his fingertips found my cheek. Almost against my will, I froze and stared. _

_ I knew now what was heating those eyes to molten gems. I had seen it before, when he was to leave for the Confederate Army. It was regret and love and passion; breathtaking. All too suddenly my mouth was dry, heart racing. "D-Damon! Don't—" He didn't listen, he never did. The hand cupping my cheek angled my face upwards, his arm around my waist drawing me close as his lips found mine._

_ Warmth spread through my body, delicious and altogether familiar. Shock shot through my blood and for a moment I resisted, trying to pull away. Damon only held me closer, lips fervent against mine. I could only hold out so long…_

_ It took seconds and then I was sighing, fingertips tangled in his hair, pulling myself closer. I remembered this, the way our bodies could fit perfectly and the soft pressure of his lips felt against mine. I remembered, and I loved the way he bit down to draw a quiet moan from my lips. Tender and sweet, his hand slipped from my cheek and suddenly both arms were around me. _

_ I had missed this. _

_ "Alex…." He sighed, leaving my lips to run his along my cheek, my jaw, my neck…_

_ "Damon-" I could hear my heart pounding, feel the goose bumps spread. Oh I had missed this, wanted this for so long! "Damon-" the words were on the tip of my tongue, hidden for ages. I spoke them only in whispered, dark thoughts. And now, now they were rushing over my tongue. I wanted to say it. I wanted to hear those words. "Damon I—"_

And suddenly he was gone, the clearing wiped away as my bedroom replaced it. Hot tears were sliding down my cheeks. God…I had missed it! Missed the kiss of my killer! I had been happy and safe! Safe in his arms!? Shaking I curled into the blankets that could not warm my skin.

Aching, I let the control fall and covered my mouth to hide the sobs. My body had betrayed me earlier. Now even my heart was betraying me. The realization was frigid and numbing. I love him. I still, after everything, love Damon Salvatore.

The sheets were off me in seconds, scattered to the hardwood floor. The house was silent as I scrambled downstairs. I tripped on the last step, catching myself on the banister. Tears were streaming down my face. Whiskey was out on the den counter already, Da' must have gotten at it before bed. Anger flared in my stomach. I was crying over him! Jesus—crying over the guy who had compelled my father! Swearing, I dug my nails into my palm and forced myself to breathe. Breathe and forget. The bottle touched my lips, hard liquor burning a trail down my throat. He didn't deserve it. I _knew _he didn't. Damon was a user and a manipulator; dangerous. I shouldn't be crying for him. Another sip, and the tears began to ease.

I shouldn't be crying for him, but I was. There was hole somewhere in my chest and it was searing, pulsing like a burn. Gods it hurt! How could I still love him? Some divine deity tell me how! Fate wasn't going to answer though. Another sip and the anger began to simmer. Now I was just angry at myself. I hated this feeling! I hated knowing that I still loved him.

Bleakly I stared at the bottle in my hand. The whiskey was easing away the pain, easing away the memory. A salty tear slipped down my cheek and dropped into the bottle. Drink and forget. Breathe and forget. I could do it…I could do it. Christ I was sounding like the Little Engine That Could, except deep down, something is telling me that I can't.

That realization hurt more than the goddamn hole in my chest.

Another sip. Drink and forget. Denial and Jack Daniel's are my new best friends.

* * *

**Sorry this took so long guys, I was having some issues channeling Alex's reaction. Anywho, rate, comment, critique, and shoot me some ideas! **

_**Theme Songs:**_

"_Jar of Hearts" – Christina Perri_

"_Skinny Love" – Birdy _

"_Gravity" – Sara Bareilles_


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